How to Handle Conflict With Narcistic Family Members

Narcissistic Mother

narcissistic mother

How to Cope with Having a Narcissistic Mother

Part of being a child ways looking to our parents for dearest, back up, and encouragement. Our parents set the foundation for feelings of safety and trust in others. It is important for children to feel seen and heard by their loved ones every bit they abound up. It can exist really painful to abound upwards with a parent who denies a kid of these emotional security blankets. Unfortunately, this is the reality for children who grow up with narcissistic mothers.

A narcissistic mother is unable to give their child the total attending and validation they need to feel loved and emotionally secure. This may touch on the child'southward beliefs, behaviors, and self-esteem well into machismo.

Keep reading this article to learn nigh narcissistic mothers and how to cope with the pain that comes with having ane.

What is Narcissism?

Some narcissistic mothers could see the criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). This is a psychological personality disorder characterized past a specific set of traits. A narcissistic mother may experience entitled or self-important, seek admiration from others, believe she is in a higher place others, lack empathy, exploit her children, put others downwardly, experience hypersensitivity to criticism, believe she deserves special treatment, and worst of all, peradventure naïve to the damage she is causing.

In add-on, a narcissistic mother may use her children to advance her own goals and wishes, at the expense of the kid's desires and even emotional or concrete needs. For instance, a narcissistic mother may order her kid to help with her numberless later complaining of being tired from a long workday and non care to enquire her child about how their day at school went. Equally a effect, the children of narcissistic mothers may grow up feeling confused, invalidated, inferior, and unloved.

Characteristics of a Narcissistic Mother

While non all narcissistic mothers have NPD, expressing narcissistic tendencies can be just every bit dissentious to a child. Here are some telltale signs you may have a narcissistic female parent.

  • She constantly makes the conversation to be nearly her
  • Brags about your achievements to others, but rarely validates or acknowledges y'all personally
  • Blames others for whatsoever issues you may take that stalk from her behavior
  • Is well-liked and important to others, but controlling and harsh when no one is looking
  • Makes you feel bad for not doing what she wants immediately
  • Makes you experience guilty past boasting near how much she does for y'all
  • Harshly opinionated at dwelling just puts up a front end for people she dislikes
  • Ruthless and unforgiving, doing anything she can to exist on top
  • Makes you experience anxious and often lowers your confidence

What Tin You Do to Cope with a Narcissistic Mother?

If you feel you take been affected by whatsoever of these traits, here are some things you can try to cope with having a narcissistic mother:

  • Make Some Room:When she doesn't go her way and takes information technology out on you lot, don't be passive! Allow her know this fashion of dealing with her anger is non constructive. Strategies to diffuse the situation tin can exist challenging to come up with on your own on the spot so it is best to think in advance and be prepared for the adjacent fourth dimension that this happens.
  • Have and Let Go:Effort to take that her narcissism is rooted in an established design of beliefs and behaviours, and this is not your fault. Call up that her hurtful words and actions come from her problematic personality and they are probably not truthful virtually you and you don't really deserve to be treated in an inconsiderate way.
  • Take Some Conviction:Dealing with a narcissistic mother can be deeply painful as she may not recognize your accomplishments and strengths. In recognizing her narcissism, information technology is likewise important to recognize your own cocky-worth, even when she downplays your strengths. Engaging in hobbies that enhance your skills and sense of accomplishment will help to heave your conviction.
  • Lean on Others:While nothing can supplant the validation a child receives from their mother, there may be other supportive figures you tin lean on like friends, teachers, co-workers, or other family unit members that you lot are shut to and show empathy and care almost you.

If you lot ever feel your condom or mental health is at gamble, it may exist necessary to proceed your altitude altogether, read books to understand this condition, and maybe go assist from a caring therapist.

Here is a video of licensed therapist Kati Morton discussing some of the consequences of narcissistic parenting and strategies to cope with it, including trauma therapy, which is further discussed beneath:

When to Get Professional Help

If you feel similar you went through a lot growing upward with a narcissistic mother, you may need to accost the bug and trauma left behind. You may desire to consult with a therapist trained in Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and Trauma Therapy. A psychotherapist knowledgeable nigh narcissistic parents may help you recognize your childhood hurting and any effects of trauma, help you heal and motion forward. A therapist tin can likewise aid you replace the lingering negative maternal vox in your head with a healthier one.

Knowledge is power. Becoming aware of the shortcomings of your egotistic mother can exit yous with a sense of freedom and power. Addressing your issues in therapy may let you to gratuitous yourself from negative cadre beliefs that you may have adult as a upshot of the parenting that constantly made y'all experience inferior or inadequate and develop the sense of value and respect that we all deserve.

Edited past Dr. Silvina Galperin, C. Psych.

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Source: https://cbtpsychology.com/narcissisticmother/

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